According to one of the books I read the preschooler is seen as wayward, confusing and unpredictable at least 60% of the time. This obviously did not leave me overwhelmingly excited.
Although the preschooler can still be tantrum prone, they should have mastered enough language to allow them to express themselves more often verbally.
Because the next phase of your child’s identity includes that they understand you are an individual not only there for their needs, you will be granted some reprieve from the immediacy of your child’s needs – helping, doing and being there for your child. Your child can wait as they also can anticipate and look forward to things. This being said your child would also be able to do a lot of menial tasks himself, wash his face and hands, pour him a drink, and put on his shoes, obviously being able to do these things all have prerequisites, as you need to bring his physical posture into account.
Your child’s love for you will change and become more in-line with an adult’s idea of love, your child will also be able to show empathy for your feelings and emotions. Your interaction with your child will be bi-directional, if you are sad he will give your attention to try and soothe you, as you would do to him.
Your child during this period in time also mimics adults these will include a number of people he will be in contact with, but mostly it means that he will imitate his mother and farther. You will most probable feel uncomfortable with the accuracy within which he will display your daily dealings, children are also prone to roleplay gender specific behaviour – he would be mum the caregiver, while he’d be dad in the more technical minded activities. These roles are played precise and often would make you feel uncomfortable as to the accuracies deployed in these games.
As your child can seem bossy and smug during this period of time, you need to understand that they are only taking control, of children younger (and children below them in status) to ensure that they obtain your approval. As they are now actively seeking your approval and love you have reached your goal and can now actively start to refine his social graces and continue to teach him.
You however need to understand that your child seeks your approval and love and that you should ensure that he receives full measures of these.
Feeding & Growth:
During this period your child’s growth will slow even more with 2.3kg gained and 8.9 cm added in length for the third year. In the fifth year this drops even more to 2kg gained and 6.4 cm added in length. It is thus pointless to do frequent weighing and these can be reduced to twice annually. If your child have not grown at all during the first six months then you should reassess your child’s growth in 3 month’s time, if this persists then take your child to the doctor; as very few children do lack a particular growth hormone.
During this time your child should have a healthy appetite and although they might have certain preferences and dislikes you should have an easy time to keep your child fed and happy. Now is the time that your would be able to start with the social aspects of mealtime, remember however to go easy as you will not be able to instill acceptable table manners overnight. This as everything will take some time.
Table manners: rather lead by example than exhortation. Point out how well another member of the family eats rather than the mess your child is making.
Ensure that his eating environment is the same as yours. He will be more likely to imitate if he sits in the same chair at the same table and eat with the same utensils.
Teach your child a sense for occasion. Set a formal meal at least once a weekend. Where everyone is at their best behaviour and all the food is served from dishes and everyone helps themselves.
Teach your child new tastes. Keep your child’s sense of adventure keen by serving them small portions of “new” food to taste and decide if they wish to have some or not.
Get your child to eat food which will make your life easier. If your child likes cheese for example you can provide meal of cheese, crackers, bread and apple in seconds, which will not interrupt your day yet is still healthy for your child to eat.
Fussy Eaters: This should be a memory from the toddler years. Your child should now eat the same food that you and the rest of your family eat, you might however still have a child that has a dislike in a specific food item, and should then allow for your child to make a meal out of what is available to her from the family meal. If you know that she does not eat minced meat for example then you should allow for a substitute protein serving, you should however try and ensure that she is able to compile a healthy meal from the provided dishes without substituting too many dishes.
Between meals: Your child is busy and would thus need more food-fuel than the rest of the family, if you child is old enough to do away with formal morning and afternoon snack-time, then in-between foods should be made available. Try and keep these healthy balanced – a fruit bowl, some raisins, some plain biscuits and bread and cheese to ask for should be available to the family for in between snacks.
Sweets: Regardless of what your policy is, as your child grows up you are faced with the fact that they will compare what they get with that of their friends. Try and stay cool and calm regarding this and try not to keep sweets in the house, by buying a small packet of sweets on the way home at regular intervals will minimise the problem. Also encourage your child to buy and alternative food treat which will instil the idea that sweets are just one of the niceties regarding food, thus the red apple or the bun he selected will be set on the same level as the packet of sweets.
Slimming: During the toddler stage already a slowed weight gain would have been seen, if your child is still chubby, and you are worried, then you should consult a doctor, it is important to look at your child’s activity level, some children would have stopped running because they are fat, which is just adding to the problem. Toddlers in general are active lively children – if your Preschooler is not so, then it might be that they feel self-conscious and or clumsy, which means that they might have already grown out of this. Play with your child and catch them and let them catch you, also try to encourage active play, where they they can climb, run and dance. This in itself will help your child to skin down. Also remember that fat children could be made the butt by others so try and be more aware of your child’s emotional state and be available to assist them should they have been bullied.
Sources:
Leach, Penelope – Baby & Child from birth to age five . Published 1977;reprinted 1984 – Great Britain | Michael Joseph Limited
Rereading this article and thinking of my teen, I can just say that this was such a lovely age, your child trying to get your approval sounds like a walk in the park.
